2024 Rendezvous Code of Conduct

Introduction

Rendezvous 2024 is a unique opportunity to center trans voices and bodies, and we depend on our attendees holding themselves to a reasonable standard of behavior so that the event can be safe, accessible, and fun, in that order of importance. We all want to have the best time that we can, and holding ourselves and each other to a reasonable standard of behavior is the bedrock of having a safe, accessible, and fun time. 

Consent

Rendezvous 2024 respects and affirms the right of individuals to consent in the ways that are meaningful to them. Consent may last for the length of a scene or the duration of a lifetime or somewhere in between. Consent may specify precisely what parts of a body may be touched by precisely what object(s) or may involve the granting of vast swaths of power to another, or somewhere in between. These forms of consent are all equally valid.

Note, that at Rendezvous 2024, consent must be affirmative. Asking someone for a hug and them not saying no is not affirmative consent. Before having any physical contact (including handshakes or hugs) with others, attendees must first establish affirmative consent.

“Consent must be freely given. Coerced consent is not true consent.

The necessity of consent is not related to role. Everyone, including bottoms and tops, must seek consent prior to engaging with another individual, and everyone, including bottoms and tops, can be capable of consent violations.

It is the responsibility of each individual to be aware of their own risk profiles. Risks can include both physical and psychological components. Risk factors should be communicated in advance whenever possible. An unexpected result, if arrived at with positive intentions, does not necessarily constitute a consent violation. Conflict also does not necessarily constitute a consent violation.

 

Consent can be withdrawn at any time before or during an activity. Consent may not be retroactively withdrawn after an activity has taken place. If you believe a consent violation has taken place, please reach out to a staff member or DM.

 

Red is the universal safe word. If a participant in an activity calls red, the activity must stop immediately. If the activity does not immediately cease, a dungeon monitor or group leader is empowered to intervene and stop the activity. In the event that speech would be impossible, such as through the use of a strict gag, a safe sign or action must be agreed upon in advance, and must be communicated to a dungeon monitor or group leader so they can recognize when an activity needs to end.”

 

[Thank you to Minnesota Femdom Collective for letting us use language from their Consent Statement, which we have slightly modified for our own event's particular needs.]

Play Party Etiquette

We are so excited to share this play space with you! This is a community house, and as such, we are sadly not able to guarantee access to all (there will be stairs to access the house and upper floor, for example).

This party is guaranteed to be full! It will likely get hot, and crowded - we recommend taking that into consideration when planning your outfit. As we are limited in resources, we are asking attendees to plan to accommodate themselves regarding things like overstimulation or need for space/quiet, as we are not able to guarantee a quiet/low-stim room.

General Etiquette

  • You are NOT required to play in any way with anyone.

  • Affirmative consent is mandatory.

  • Ensure you are following any and all rules the specific play party location, and don’t assume a rule from a previous year will hold true for the current year.

  • Parties are divided between social areas and play areas.

  • Social areas (which will be clearly marked as such) are for socializing only, and will be outside in the backyard.

  • When outside, you must wear street legal clothing at all times, this includes the backyard.

  • Please do not socialize in play areas - space will be limited, and talk can be distracting for players.

  • Keep a towel or barrier between genitals and non-play furniture.

  • DO NOT interfere with other people’s scenes. If you are concerned about the play you are witnessing, inform the nearest dungeon monitor (DM).

  • Keep your talking in play areas to a whisper if you are not the one playing.

  • Please be thoughtful about the scents you bring into this event (like perfumes, colognes, cigarette smoke, etc). 

  • Dungeon monitors (DM’s) are there to make sure the rules are followed and to answer guests' questions. They will be clearly marked by what they wear (i.e. safety vests). You will be informed of what to look for beforehand.

  • DO NOT touch toys that are not yours without the owner's express permission.

  • If you are not sure about what play is allowed (i.e. CNC, edgeplay) ask the nearest dungeon monitor (DM) before beginning. Having a scene stopped partway through is a bad time for everyone.

  • Types of play that are not allowed

    • Cops, army, nazi play.

    • Race play.

    • Intoxication play.

    • Scat, vomit, urine, blood, fire (sadly, we need to consider space, time, and group safety when restricting these types of play).

    • Breath play and blood chokes to the point of losing consciousness are not allowed. Do not play near this line. Neck rope (rope wrapped around a neck) is specifically not allowed, even if breath play is not involved.

Play station rules:

Our rules this year reflect our attempts to allow for longer scenes, more equitable access to play stations, and reducing problematic congestion. We understand this is not a perfect solution and ask for your understanding as well. We are absolutely open to other ideas for future events!

  • Play stations will be available for 25 minute scenes + 5 minutes set aside for cleanup and reset (30 minute blocks)

  • We expect all toys will be put away, towels removed, and any relevant fluids sanitized, etc. Just leave it in nice shape for the next person? We’re not cops.

  • Play stations will turn over every 30 minutes starting at the top of the hour (So, 8pm, 8:30pm, 9pm, etc)

  • Play station use will be managed via a signup sheet to allow attendees to plan their scenes without needing to “camp” a play station.

  • If you do not show up to your slot within the first 5 minutes, we may allow someone else to use your slot on a first-come first-serve basis. If your scene begins late, we still expect you to end on time.

  • We anticipate that we will have greater demand for play stations than we will be able to meet. Plan to only participate in only one play station scene during the party.

    • This is a small, grass roots, trans lead, fetish organization with limited resources. This weekend is a great opportunity to be in space and socialize with your community. Please do not take advantage of our limited and generously donated resources - we want as many attendees as possible to have hot, memorable times!

  • No recording of any kind is allowed at the party. This includes video, audio, and photography. Phones may be used to check time or for specific accessibility reasons (we will also have clocks around the venue). Be careful to keep your phone level with the ground any time it is out. Make sure you carefully review our “Cameras and Recording” policy below, as violation of it can result in full ejection from the weekend.

  • Each person is responsible for their own aftercare. We will have some snacks and waters available, but we recommend you bring your own.

  • Intoxication (alcohol, marijuana, recreational drugs) that interferes with your ability to give informed affirmative consent is strictly prohibited, and if you are deemed too intoxicated by a staff member, we may ask you to leave the venue.

  • We understand exes or activating individuals may be present at this party. We expect our attendees to remove themselves from situations that are triggering or activating. Respect others’ boundaries around communication. Review our Anti-Harassment and Anti-Bullying policy below for more detail.

Social Media & Confidentiality

Some events that are part of Rendezvous 2024 will be hosted at private homes belonging to community members. Sharing said locations to non-attendees of Rendezvous 2024, especially on social media, could result in these community members being doxxed and seriously harmed. We implore you to respect their right to privacy.


Feel free to share your own personal experiences and stories from Rendezvous 2024, but respect other attendees and their right to confidentiality by not sharing details of who else attended or what they did there (this includes presenters and organizers).

Cameras & Recording

Related to attendees’ rights to privacy and confidentiality, no recording of any kind will be allowed in any Rendezvous 2024 space by attendees. This includes parties, classes, and the pool party, and recordings including audio recording, video recording, or photography. Non-camera phone use is permitted during Rendezvous 2024.

Classes

Rendezvous staff may take pre-approved photos of presenters during classes, but we will ensure these photos do not include any attendees.

Saturday night play party

During the Saturday night play party, phones may only be used for accessibility reasons or to check time, and must be kept parallel to the ground to avoid concerns about camera use.

Sunday pool party

During the Sunday pool party, phone use is permitted, but no recording (video, audio) or photography of any type is allowed. Parallel to the ground mindset here too, please. There will be a lot of hot naked people around.

IMPROPER USE OF A PHONE OR RECORDING DEVICE WILL RESULT IN BEING REMOVED FROM THE EVENT AND THE REMAINDER OF THE WEEKEND, CONSIDERED ON A CASE-BY-CASE BASIS BY EVENT STAFF. IT WON’T BE CUTE.

Furthermore, if any attendees behave in such a way that event staff suspect they may have been recording, attendees will be asked to consent to a search and/or will be asked to leave to protect the space and everyone there.


Exceptions are that volunteers will need to communicate with each other through their phones and in case of a medical emergency. We will ensure volunteers are visually identifiable to avoid confusion or concern. If you are an attendee who needs their phone as an accessibility device at a party, please inform a DM ahead of time to support their job of keeping the party safe.

Anti-Harassment & Anti-Bullying

To protect our attendees, educators, volunteers, and organizers we prohibit harassment, both in-person and online. Harassment includes bullying, offensive comments, repeated unsolicited messaging, and discrimination based on sex, gender, orientation, race, color, religion, age, genetic information, or disability. Where allegations of harassment or harassing conduct are substantiated, prompt and appropriate investigation and action will be taken. Repeat offenses may result in a block from our social media, removal from the event, and/or a ban from future events.

 

COVID-19, Masking, & Vaccine Policy

An up-to-date COVID-19 vaccine is required (or negative test shown at the door each day). Masks are not required, but are encouraged, and we will have a small quantity of them at the door. If able, please bring a mask (surgical or n95/Kn95 are preferred as cloth masks are not as effective). If you are not feeling well, stay home and protect your community. Please reach out to us in the event that you are sick, and we will work with you to find a happy solution.

You can locate your COVID-19 vaccine information on most healthcare apps (like MyChart or MHealth), or by reaching out to your healthcare provider. The most recent vaccine was released in September of 2023, if you have gotten an updated vaccine between now and then, you are in the clear!

“Legalese”

Rendezvous 2024 is a private event, and we reserve the right to remove anyone at any time for any reason. Being rude or disrespectful could get you banned from current and/or future events. We reserve the right to revoke attendance privileges from any attendee, and refunds for such action will be considered on a case-by-case basis.

While we will absolutely make an effort to avoid involving the police, we reserve that right if we determine it is a necessary action to take.